Thursday, November 16, 2006

Gears of War...

Wow! I really don't know how to describe the emersive intuitive way this game plays. The dynamic of hiding behind objects for cover is implemented quite uniquely and I don't think anyone has done it this way before.

Oh, and the graphics....oh my the graphics. They are just so freakin' pretty. If you have an xbox 360, you MUST get this game.


Wednesday, September 27, 2006

slowly eating away at me...

Every time someone abbreviates a three letter word, I die a little inside.

Monday, July 03, 2006

I made a web comic!

Yeah, it's pretty great:

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Canada's Olympic Performance

Let me preface this by saying I wrote his back in February at the end of the winter games. I'm not too sure why I didn't post it back then, maybe because it's not very funny.

In any event, on to the blog:

So with the closing of the Winter Olympics, and reviewing Canada's performance I'd say we can't be too unhappy (except with our Men's hockey team who were apparently trying to be 'cute' and that's why they lost). We set a new record in winning most medals, came third place (only behind the states by 1 medal) in most medals won. Overall good job Canada!

I think to commemorate a job well done, Disney should make a sequel to Cool Runnings involving another country's foray into an unlikely Olympic event. I've done them a solid by coming up with a few ideas for the premise:

Who are you guys?
We're the chinese hockey team!

Who are you guys?
We're the San Fransican two man luge team!

Who are you guys?
We're the Canadian Basketball Team

Did you know that 'Handball' is an officially recognized Olympic sport, and has been since 1936? I sure didn't...craziness.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Top 10 brilliant song lyrics since 1980.

Here's a little look (in no particular order) of some lyrical gold we've received from the music industry over the last quarter of a century:

10. 'Word to your moms I came to drop bombs'

Song: Jump Around
Artist: House of Pain
Year: 1992

This line makes no bones about it's business. HoP is here to assault your ears with lyrical goodness that is sure to make your parents yell "turn down that racket". 1992 was a different time, a simpler time where it was acceptable to rhyme moms with bombs and parachute pants were still dope.

9. 'Like Haagen- Dazs you hit the spot / You Make me scream cause you got a lot'

Song: Sexiest Woman Alive
Artist: O-Town
Year: 2001

This lyric narrowly beat out 50-Cent's 'I love you like a fat kid loves cake'. It was very close, but in the end O-Town pulled ahead because of how they brilliantly leveraged product placement with a debut tiny bopper CD.

I wonder how much they got paid by Haagen Dazs...

8. 'If I was invisible, then I could just watch you in your room.'

Song: If I was Invisible
Artist: Clay Aiken
Year: 2003

Clay Aiken not only ranks in at number 8, but he also wins the creepy stalker award. Rumor has it the original lyrics went something like "If I was invisible, then I could just watch you in your room...while you got undressed, and then I'd steal some of your unmentionables", but the producer just didn't think that would fly.

This particular song also gets bonus points for being grammatically incorrect in a technical sense. The proper word to use is in that particular situation is "were". Also, since was and were are both one syllable words, it wouldn't have really affected the song to be grammatically correct.

7. 'He was a boy, she was a girl. Can I make it any more obvious?'

Song: Sk8er Boi
Artist: Avril Lavigne
Year: 2002

Hailing from Napanee, (well known for it's rich and longstanding skater culture) Avril gives us this lyrical gem of stupidity in a song. Can you make it anymore obvious? Well, Avril, unless they'll let you show us their 'wee-wees' and 'who-ahs', probably not. I know this one is kinda weak, but Avril gets bonus points for being retarded.

6. 'You make me wanna la la'

Song: La La
Artist: Ashlee Simpson
Year: 2004

I don't think I need to explain the stupidity of the aforementioned song or specific lyric, as it's readily apparent. However, if I were a betting man, I would put good money on the fact that I'm not the only one that hopes that by "la la" Ashlee means "asyphixiate myself with the shrink wrap from one of my albums"

5. 'there ain't no party like an S Club party'

Song: S Club Party
Artist: S Club 7
Year: 2000

Does anyone over the age of 13 actually want to go to an "S Club Party"? I really doubt it. It sounds a bit duller than an PCP party (that's 'parents, chips and pop' party for the uninitiated). I'm pretty sure if you actually did show up to one, it'd be just like the song...a bunch of vague, new-age like affirmations and niceties about how we're all generally good and special.

4. 'If you get down on me, I'll get down on you'

Song: Get Down
Artist: B4-4
Year: 2000

I remember when this song hit the radio. I also remember thinking: 'Am I the only one who realizes how sketchy the lyrics to this song are?'. Sure it sounds all sugary sweet, but just reading the lyrics without the poppy's not quite the same now is it? Yes, clearly this is the message we need to be passing on to the 13 year-olds of the generation....good message...riiiiight.

3. 'I'll ask 21 questions, and they all about us'

Song: 21 Questions
Artist: 50 Cent
Year: 2003

Fitty, obviously failed basic mathematics. There are not 21 questions in this song, and no matter how you look at it, you can't arrive at 21 questions....graaaah.

2. 'I ain't sayin' she's a gold digger'

Song: Golddigger
Artist: Kanye West
Year: 2005

Right, you aren't saying she is a gold digger...just that she has all the qualities of a gold digger. Kayne, you're a moron, and you seem to think you are Jesus. You're not...seriously.

1. 'I gotta shake it off, cause the loving ain't the same..'

Song: Shake it Off
Artist: Mariah Carey
Year: 2005

In this song, Mariah tries to paint us a imaginative picture of how her 'man is doin' her wrong'. Mariah, you're not fooling anyone. We haven't forgotten that you're crazier than this lady (in obviously different ways). You can change your name to Mi Mi, but that won't make you any less mentally imbalanced!

There you have it, I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Small to medium woodland creatures beware, and horses look out too!

So, I'm not sure what it is...but ever since I got the Civic last weekend, it's been like I'm piloting four wheels of vehicular cute-cuddly-creaturicide.

So far, I've nailed at least 3 of em, (including one abnormally large racoon that took a hunk of plastic out of the bottom of my car tonight) and had like half a dozen near misses.

Oh, also...I almost hit a horse tonight high speeds, ah fun, fun.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

I wish...

18 year old chicks from foreign countries would stop messaging me and adding me to their friends list. It's kinda creepy.

Also, I put the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme song as my ring tone. We're not talking I downloaded some semblance of a crapy ring tone from some website here, I actually found the MP3 of the original theme song...hacked into my phone and uploaded it.

Yes I am aware of how geeky that is...